There are rules.
You can't chew gum in school. You can't play "pull my finger" at work. You can't drive naked through a Taco Bell drive thru and order a cheesy gordita. (Even though I'm sure there were no signs.) Without rules, society would break down, the world would be plunged into utter chaos, and I don't even like your stupid cheesy gorditas anyway, you corporate fascists.
Horror movies are no different. There are certain do's and don'ts to be followed, and diehard fans of the genre know them all. (For example, teenagers who have sex in a cabin while a 6' 9" hatchet killer is on the loose may not have half a brain in their heads, but soon half a brain is all they'll have in their heads.) The familiarity found in most teen scream movies is part of their appeal, and knowing the rules is like gaining membership into an exclusive club, only without all that pesky "human interaction" and "need for hygiene."
Because of this familiarity, film makers have found new ground to till. Movies like Scream and Cabin In the Woods skirt these unwritten rules while winking knowingly at the audience who they assume is in on the joke. But there are also a few films that not only wink at the audience, they slap them on the ass and guffaw in their face.
Feast, a horror comedy from 2005, is an excellent example.
Created by the winners of the reality show Project Greenlight, a documentary style series about unknown movie makers competing to get a film made, Feast is quirky and likable. From the purposely ridiculous dialogue ("Old people know things, like legends and tall tales and shit") to the creative casting (Henry Rollins wearing pink sweatpants is mildly hysterical in itself), the movie feels like a College Humor video but plays like a big budget thriller.
A crappy little bar in a crappy little desert town is doing a fine business serving watery bourbon and draft beer to a motley crew of clientele. Every stereotype is represented here, and the movie labels each one as they appear onscreen, complete with fun facts about the character and their chance of survival. (Read fast. These are pretty good.) Best of all, directors Patrick Osborne and John Gulager make a choice early on that sets their movie apart from lesser creature features.
They get right to the action!
The audience doesn't need to know why there are flesh eating monsters in the middle of nowhere, or how they got here, or why they dress in animal carcasses and wear longhorn skulls like party hats. It's fine! We don't care!
Just get on with the killing already!
And get to the killing they do. Before the audience even has a chance to put the audience's arm around the audience's girlfriend, windows are smashed, doors are crashed, heads are bashed, and blood is sprayed around the room like furry little hamsters trapped in a microwave. (Seriously, those little guys are cute.)In fact, gore is abundant throughout the film. One scene in particular (let's call it "the one where the guy gets his eye pulled out") is so gross that I could barely rewind it four times to watch again.
Unfortunately, as fun as Feast can be, it does have its flaws, the main one being the creatures. The monsters look like high school mascots that were burned in a fire. They are not very scary (except for some pretty nasty dental work) and not very believable. And less a flaw than an annoyance, the cameras jerk around so violently during the attack scenes that the DVD should come with Dramamine.
Although the plot (what plot?) is ho-hum hokey and the acting is B-grade silly, Feast is one of those rare films that doesn't just play with horror fans, it plays to them. It's like a party. A party where giant monsters with claws sneeze green snot onto you which makes your body slowly disintegrate from the inside out until you're as squishy as a ripe melon. But still, you know. You're invited.
So if you happen to have an appetite for horror comedies or horror movies in general, Feast is a film that will get your digestive juices flowing. You'll want to sink your teeth into it. You're going to eat this movie up...
Dang, I'm starving.
Okay you win, you taco terrorists.
Where's my pants?
What did you think of this movie/review? Let us know in the comments below! Also, if you have a favorite film you would like to see reviewed here, type that into the comments for future consideration. (All accepted suggestions will be credited.) Thanks, and best of luck staying above room temperature!
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