HENRY: PORTRAIT OF A SERIAL KILLER

Not Rated
1986

For ex-con Henry, there is no right side of the bed. Every day, unburdened by a conscience or even a good comb, he roams the countryside slaughtering men, women and children with all the emotion of a goth chick on Thorazine. When the oafish Otis is introduced to Henry's slasher shenanigans, the pair leave a trail of viscera that even the Marquis de Sade would find distasteful. Tensions build after Otis' sister Becky enters the scene and is immediately smitten by Henry's dirty wife-beater undershirt and an apparent ability to go days without blinking. Full of splattered tubs, human stubs and a luggage nightmare even United Airlines couldn't top, Henry doesn't just leave an emotional scar. It gives you one. 

Henry: Portrait of a Serial Killer Trailer

AUDITION

Rated R
1999
Japanese

A widowed film producer tries to find a girlfriend the old-fashioned way—by inviting pretty young ladies to audition for movies that don't exist. Falling for the hot but "damn that girl is crazy" Asami, he discovers too late that lonely heart strings may ache but piano wire cuts like a mother. Takashi Miike's gore-fest is a test of endurance that will leave you on pins and a whole lot of very sharp, very long needles, while sociopath Asami's gleeful "tee-dee, tee-dee, tee-dee" will haunt all your English subtitled nightmares forever.


Audition Trailer

THE LAST HOUSE ON THE LEFT

Not Rated
1972
 
Seventeen year old Mari has the worst birthday ever when she and her friend Phyllis try to purchase some gateway drugs and instead find themselves the involuntary guests of freshly escaped convict Krug and his cast of human detritus. After taking the girls into the woods to perform acts that even Spanish Inquisitors would be like, "Oh hell no," the girls are murdered. In a perfectly reasonable coincidence, the gang accidentally shows up at Mari's house where their identity and Mari's fate are exposed. Mari's parents exact revenge in not very nice ways which in turn ruins most of their furniture. Though not great, this film gets one pint for its ridiculous soundtrack and four because David Hess is a freaking lunatic.

Last House On The Left Trailer 

A HORRIBLE WAY TO DIE...My Boyfriend's Back and You're Gonna Be In Treatment

A Horrible Way To Die (R) 2010


Breakups. They're just the worst, right? You meet someone, invite them to coffee, help them move, tattoo their name on your neck, pay their way through college, and before you know it, you're planning a second date.

But then the trouble starts.

"Where was he till 4 a.m.?" You wonder.
"Whose blood is that on his collar?" You stew.
"Why does he smell like the mailman who's been missing since last Thursday?" You stew and wonder.

Inevitably the reassurances of "I love you," and "You know I only have eyes for you here in my pocket," turn into "I want space," and "It's not you it's me," and "I think I need to kill other people..."

Until once again you're left to pick up the pieces, or at least point them out to the local authorities, and move on. Leaving you to ask the same old question:

"Why are all the good ones always taken into custody?"

Well, if that's your story, then this snappy little independent film, A Horrible Way To Die, is right up your alley. And if not? It's still better than speed dating.

BIG BAD WOLVES...My What Big "Oys" You Have

Big Bad Wolves (NR) 2013

Hebrew with English Subtitles

Stop me if you've heard this one.

Guy walks into a dungeon to do some torturing, but just as he's lifting his hammer the phone rings. "I have to take this," he grumbles to his victim.

"It's my mother."

And there you have the essence of Big Bad Wolves, a quirky movie full of crime and punishment, and a healthy dose of chutzpa.